Employee of the month

WARNING: IT IS ENTIRELY POSSIBLE THAT NOTHING YOU READ HERE IS TRUE.

It has been no small amount of time since I last wrote something for fun, and it's making me itchy. Most of my writing these days is either reports or stuff that looks like this:

import itertools
chain = itertools.chain(*work)
work = list((chain))
#print(work)
life = {item: [] for item in work}

and although that's fun, it's also not exactly fun. It's fun in a different direction.

This blog therefore is aimed mostly at being a bit more fun. It'll provide a small outlet for my creativity - such as it is - while avoiding most of what I do, because what I do is super-secret-spy-stuff for a vague yet menacing Government agency.

We are recruiting, by the way, so just pop your CV in an email and send it. It doesn't matter who to. We'll be in touch.

I know, you don't want to hear about my work - but stuff like that gets me Employee of the Month quite regularly. It's a cool award:

Meanwhile, Things Are Happening in the wider world. I can't talk about most of them, obviously, but what I can say is that Netflix is knocking it out of the park with its selection of programming. My partner and I got seriously into How To Get Away With Murder, cuddling up every evening with tea, a blanket, and notebooks to make sure we didn't miss anything. We may be out of university but we still love to learn something new!

It's a shame we have to wait for the next series, but in the meantime we're enjoying Jessica Jones. It's a dystopian world in which a white male uses a power society doesn't believe he has - indeed, a power even he claims he's not sure he has - to brutally abuse, rape, and murder people who cross him. It presents a stark parallel to the world we live in from day-to-day, where that sort of thing never happens - thank goodness!

Oh, and my birthday is coming up soon - that exciting time when my friends and family, thankful that the uncaring universe has not brought my measly existence to an end, give gifts. This year I'm hoping for a smartwatch, the better to record the steady pace of time slipping away from me. Plus, I can answer emails, see my calendar, and control the playback of my Government-approved music - so cool.

And of course Christmas is just around the corner - the point when a combination of the Earth's axial tilt and its passage around a hydrogen furnace ensure long nights and short days. It's a time for family, for eating lots, for drinking alcohol, for realising in the fuzzy maze of your brain that there is something terribly wrong with the people you're eating with. They smile too much, and their teeth are so terribly sharp, and they call you Jonathan. Ugh. Relatives, right?

Still, we should be thankful for them. Relatives, unlike teeth and the biscuits in my cupboard, are never replaced. So do remind them that you love them this holiday season.

We'll know if you don't.